First off, thank you so much everyone for the support and kind words. It really did help and not only me. I have a close friend with a little one and she was going through a hard time too. I sent her here to read what you all had written and it brought her comfort. So thank you.
New starts; we have flowers coming up under the birdfeeder.
Things have improved the last couple of days. I took down the tree and the kids and I drug it out into the woods. There is a depression in the ground here that is always holding standing water and there are always tracks around it. I was thinking it could act as cover for something small using this drink station, a rabbit or birds maybe.
Here they are breaking ice off of the puddle. I found a raccoon mandible and pelvis which of course caused a fight, the 2 year old screaming "NO! is MINE PELVIS!" when his brother wanted to hold it. It's ridiculous the way Mr. A will fight over absolutely everything when he dearly loves his older brother. When I hand Mr. A. anything of high value, like a cookie, he 100% of the time will ask for a second one with the purpose of gifting it to Mr. H. "Bro have cookie too?" But show him a raccoon bone and he goes nuts, apparently
The tree came down, things got cleaned up and organized.